A Welcome Back to All

It feels great to be back in the classroom, but the task ahead is a serious one. Last semester was a real struggle for me to see myself through but I want to work to find myself having a smoother conclusion to this thesis process now. Last semester I started the process by panicking, but when that didn’t seem to do much for me I looked to the theses of my classmates to try to understand where they were coming from. What I found was that there was a strong pull to expression and writing from experience. It was effectively this self-expression that had always dogged me in my life so I decided then to challenge myself to write my thesis in a similar vein.

I decided to incorporate my “background” of Comp Lit to assist in informing me of how to direct myself in my efforts since it does not come entirely naturally to me I don’t think. I found articles to help put to words the feelings I have on the importance of just general insight and self-awareness, as well as covering bases to help keep me on a positive vector and out of rumination. I also found articles which give some stability to the feelings I struggle with keeping from toppling over my efforts, namely feelings of falseness and a lack of identity. When Peter Elbow also feels like a phony I can at least rest assured that far more intelligent people than I have also struggled with my mortal concerns.

But I also wrote. I started an exploration and a chronicling of my history as a “””writer””” which amounted mostly to writing out what negativity there was to start for me but also an acknowledgement of the importance I placed on writing even then. I have always found inspiration through others so when I feel stuck I enjoy taking time to read academic and creative pieces which elevates my spirits and gives me perspective.

My plan for the semester is that every week I want to have between 2-3 entries in this “journal” as well as having at least one additional resource which helped me. That resource could be an article or it could be something derived from a novel which influenced me for that week and helped inform my process.

Thesis Denouement

It seems like just yesterday I sent an email to Dr. Zamora to inquire about the MA program here at Kean University.  Now I am in the last semester of this program and am drawing near the end of my thesis, and it all seems so surreal in a way.  Crazy.  Over break, I took some much needed time to decompress where I could, as my job got much busier and more intense as we entered the heart of the holiday season.  I had the chance to spend the holidays with my family and do some things that I wanted to do (finish watching Supernatural, continue working on my tattoo sleeve.)  My project, however, was never far from my mind.

I did make sure that I carved out some time to sit down and think about where I go from here with my thesis.  For me, the most important thing was to map out my story and get a final sense of the events and the order in which they are going to happen.  Now, some of these things can change depending on how these first few weeks of continued development play out, but the bulk of the story is definitely set, leaving me with the task of simply sitting down and writing it (piece of cake, right?)  

Mapping out my semester, I think the most important thing for me, especially early on in this semester is that I commit to writing for about two hours at a minimum a week to start, just to ensure that I do not drift too far away from it.  Allowing my classmates and Dr. Zamora in to see my progress and listen to their suggestions is going to be a large cog in the machine that is the production of my thesis.  I have reached the stage where feedback is the most important asset that we have in this class to make sure we are heading down the right track.  As far as timelines or deadlines that I have thought about for myself, I do not want to restrict myself or put myself under any more pressure than there is already attached to this project, so I am not going to give hard dates on when I expect to reach certain milestones.  Just want to let it all come to me as it comes.    

That’s all I have for you guys.  See you all tonight!